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Topics - crazy

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Open Chat / Buddy the tractor survived the rollover!!
« on: October 25, 2008, 05:52:25 PM »
Man, it came through the accident better than me.  The cylinders were full of oil, (which had the engine seized),  the crankcase was empty and the hydraulic oil was gone, as well as the float was stuck in the carbeurator.   It took a little over $100 worth of petroleum in all forms to get it back, but it looks OK.

I will have to get or make a muffler, as it was already in bad shape and is now shot.  If I had a mig welder, I could probably fix it.  But I only have a cheap stick welder, and it would make a mess.  

I have been back down there where I turned it over, and it is a dangerous place.   If I were bushhogging again down there, I would probably make the same mistake again.  It just doesn\'t look like a dropoff there.  It is downright eerie.  

For anyone who does any tractor work, be extra careful.    Always walk over any thick places, to look for holes, ditches or drop-offs.   I have been doing farming work for almost all my life.  I am well experience in this stuff.   But I came close to death in an instant.  I hope I never go through this again.

Be careful guys.   Crazy

Software Talk / How to disable a key on a keyboard with Vista
« on: October 15, 2008, 07:14:11 PM »
On the right top corner of the keyboard, just under the delete key, is a "home" key.  I keep hitting it by accident, and it messes up my paragraphs.  Does anyone know how to disable this key?  I may try to take the button off, but it is a brand new Gateway and I don\'t wanna tear it up.  Any ideas guys?   I sure do appreciate any input on this. Thanx,  crazy

Debate Forum / Beware of change without details!
« on: September 27, 2008, 12:19:30 PM »
Editor, Times-Dispatch:

Each year I get to celebrate Independence Day twice. On June 30 I celebrate my independence day and on July 4 I celebrate America\'s. This year is special, because it marks the 40th anniversary of my independence.

On June 30, 1968, I escaped Communist Cuba and a few months later I was in the United States to stay. That I happened to arrive in Richmond on Thanksgiving Day is just part of the story, but I digress.

I\'ve thought a lot about the anniversary this year. The election-year rhetoric has made me think a lot about Cuba and what transpired there. In the late 1950s, most Cubans thought Cuba needed a change, and they were right. So when a young leader came along, every Cuban was at least receptive.

When the young leader spoke eloquently and passionately and denounced the old system, the press fell in love with him. They never questioned who his friends were or what he really believed in. When he said he would help the farmers and the poor and bring free medical care and education to all, everyone followed. When he said he would bring justice and equality to all, everyone said "Praise the Lord." And when the young leader said, "I will be for change and I\'ll bring you change," everyone yelled, "Viva Fidel!"

But nobody asked about the change, so by the time the executioner\'s guns went silent the people\'s guns had been taken away. By the time everyone was equal, they were equally poor, hungry, and oppressed. By the time everyone received their free education it was worth nothing. By the time the press noticed, it was too late, because they were now working for him. By the time the change was finally implemented Cuba had been knocked down a couple of notches to Third-World status. By the time the change was over more than a million people had taken to boats, rafts, and inner tubes. You can call those who made it ashore anywhere else in the world the most fortunate Cubans. And now I\'m back to the beginning of my story.

Luckily, we would never fall in America for a young leader who promised change without asking, what change? How will you carry it out? What will it cost America?

Would we?

Manuel Alvarez Jr.

Trivia And Games / The Football fan.......
« on: September 25, 2008, 10:31:05 PM »
Two boys are playing football in Central Park when one is attacked by a rabid rottweiler. Thinking quickly, the other boy rips a board off of a nearby fence, wedges it down the dog\'s collar and twists, breaking the dog\'s neck.
A reporter strolling by sees the incident, and rushes over to interview the boy.
"Young Giants Fan Saves Friend From Vicious Animal," he writes in his notebook.
"But I\'m not a Giants fan," the little hero replies.
"Sorry, since we are in New York, I just assumed you were," says the reporter.
"Little Jets Fan Rescues Friend From Horrific Attack," he writes in his notebook.
"I\'m not a Jets fan either," the boy says.
"I assumed everyone in New York was either for the Giants or Jets. What team do you root for?" the reporter asks.
"I\'m a Cowboys fan," the child says.
The reporter starts a new sheet in his notebook and writes, "Little Redneck Maniac Kills Beloved Family Pet".

Trivia And Games / Deer Roping
« on: September 24, 2008, 08:48:49 PM »
Roping A Deer

(Names have been removed to protect the stupid!)

Actual Letter from someone who writes, and farms.

I had this idea that I was going to rope a deer, put it in a stall,
feed it up on corn for a couple of weeks, then kill it and eat it.

The first step in this adventure was getting a deer. I figured that,
since they congregate at my cattle feeder and do not seem to have much
fear of me when we are there (a bold one will sometimes come right up
and sniff at the bags of feed while I am in the back of the truck not
4 feet away), it should not be difficult to rope one, get up to it and
toss a bag over its head (to calm it down) then hog tie it and
transport it home.

I filled the cattle feeder then hid down at the end with my rope.

The cattle, having seen the roping thing before, stayed well back.
They were not having any of it.

After about 20 minutes, my deer showed up -- 3 of them. I picked
out a likely looking one, stepped out from the end of the feeder,
and threw my rope. The deer just stood there and stared at me.

I wrapped the rope around my waist and twisted the end so I would have
a good hold. The deer still just stood and stared at me, but you could
tell it was mildly concerned about the whole rope situation.

I took a step towards took a step away. I put a little tension
on the rope and then received an education.

The first thing that I learned is that, while a deer may just stand
there looking at you funny while you rope it, they are spurred to
action when you start pulling on that rope.

That deer EXPLODED.

The second thing I learned is that pound for pound, a deer is a LOT
stronger than a cow or a colt. A cow or a colt in that weight range I
could fight down with a rope and with some dignity.

A deer-- no chance.

That thing ran and bucked and twisted and pulled. There was no
controlling it and certainly no getting close to it. As it jerked me
off my feet and started dragging me across the ground, it occurred to
me that having a deer on a rope was not nearly as good an idea as I
had originally imagined.

The only upside is that they do not have as much stamina as many
other animals.

A brief 10 minutes later, it was tired and not nearly as quick to jerk
me off my feet and drag me when I managed to get up. It took me a few
minutes to realize this, since I was mostly blinded by the blood
flowing out of the big gash in my head. At that point, I had lost my
taste for corn-fed venison. I just wanted to get that devil creature
off the end of that rope.

I figured if I just let it go with the rope hanging around its neck,
it would likely die slow and painfully somewhere.

At the time, there was no love at all between me and that deer. At
that moment, I hated the thing, and I would venture a guess that the
feeling was mutual.

Despite the gash in my head and the several large knots where I had
cleverly arrested the deer\'s momentum by bracing my head against
various large rocks as it dragged me across the ground, I could still
think clearly enough to recognize that there was a small chance that I
shared some tiny amount of responsibility for the situation we were
in, so I didn\'t want the deer to have to suffer a slow death, so I
managed to get it lined back up in between my truck and the feeder - a
little trap I had set before hand...kind of like a squeeze chute.

I got it to back in there and I started moving up so I could get my
rope back.

Did you know that deer bite? They do! I never in a million years would
have thought that a deer would bite somebody, so I was very surprised
when I reached up there to grab that rope and the deer grabbed hold of
my wrist.

Now, when a deer bites you, it is not like being bit by a horse where
they just bite you and then let go. A deer bites you and shakes its
head --almost like a pit bull. They bite HARD and it hurts.

The proper thing to do when a deer bites you is probably to freeze and
draw back slowly. I tried screaming and shaking instead. My method was

It seems like the deer was biting and shaking for several minutes, but
it was likely only several seconds.

I, being smarter than a deer (though you may be questioning that claim
by now) tricked it.

While I kept it busy tearing the tendons out of my right arm, I
reached up with my left hand and pulled that rope loose.

That was when I got my final lesson in deer behavior for the day.

Gear Head / Got a fuel problem with my 01 GMC truck.
« on: September 19, 2008, 10:30:13 PM »
While out of town, my truck quit while idling during my lunch break.   Skipped once, then quit.  It would fire off of ether, but would not stay running.   I checked all fuses and relays/breakers.   Concluded it was the electric fuel pump.  Took tank off, pump out, plugged it up and it would not run the 5 seconds or so it was supposed to after switch is turned on.  Spent $254 that I had to borrow on a new fuel pump.  :( :(     New pump would not run either.   :eyepop:   Couldn\'t take it back, as it was electrical and now used.  The pump has 4 wires going to it.  2 for the fuel gauge, 2 for the pump.   I used jumper cables and new pump worked fine.  I spent 3 days going through this, with my truck left sitting in a parking lot 3 hours from home.  Today was Friday, and I was coming home one way or the other.   The only wire I could find was #10 solid copper!  But I straight wired it, no fuse or switch :eyepop:  and it got me running.
   Now I wonder what the problem really is.  Has the computer died, or do I have a broken/shorted wire somewhere?   I shook the entire harness while someone worked the key back and forth.  My redneck repair was just to get me home.  Mission accomplished.  So where do I go from here?   Thanx guys for the input.   These models had chronic fuel pump/wire problems.  But is this the case?  Thanx again,  Crazy

Trivia And Games / I love my job!
« on: September 11, 2008, 09:09:44 PM »
If you don\'t laugh out loud after you read this you are in a coma! This is even funnier when you realize it\'s real! Next time you have a bad day at work think of this guy.
Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana . He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs.
Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it to radio station 103.2 on FM dial in Ft. Wayne , Indiana , who was sponsoring a worst job experience contest. Needless to say, she won.

Hi Sue, Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother.Last week I had a bad day at the office. I know you\'ve been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it\'s not so bad after all.
Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job.
As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It\'s a wet suit. This time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water heater.
This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature.
It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose. Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I\'ve used it several times with no complaints.
What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wet suit. This floods my whole suit with warm water. It\'s like working in a Jacuzzi.
Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to itch. So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a few seconds my butt started to burn.
I pulled the hose out from my back, but the damage was done.
In agony I realized what had happened.
The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit. Now, since I don\'t have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn\'t stick to it However, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate.
When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into the crack of my butt.
I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with five other divers, were all laughing hysterically.
Needless to say I aborted the dive. I was instructed to make three agonizing in-water decompression stops totaling thirty-five minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression. When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet.
As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber.

The cream put the fire out, but I couldn\'t poop for two days because my butt was swollen shut.
So, next time you\'re having a bad day at work, think about how much worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt.
Now repeat to yourself, \'I love my job, I love my job, I love my job.\'
Whenever you have a bad day, ask yourself, is this a jellyfish bad day?
May you NEVER have a jellyfish bad day.


Trivia And Games / The messy divorce, darn that woman!
« on: September 08, 2008, 10:02:26 PM »

She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases.

On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things .

On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining room table by candle-light, put on some soft background music, and feasted on a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar, and a bottle of spring-water .

When she had finished, she went into each and every room and deposited a few half-eaten shrimp shells dipped in caviar into the hollow of the curtain rods.

She then cleaned up the kitchen and left. When the husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the first few days.

Then slowly, the house began to smell.

They tried everything; cleaning, mopping and airing the place out .

Vents were checked for dead rodents and carpets were steam cleaned .

Air fresheners were hung everywhere. Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during which they had to move out for a few days and in the end they even paid to replace the expensive wool carpeting.
Nothing worked!!!

People stopped coming over to visit.
Repairmen refused to work in the house.
The maid quit.

Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move.

A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they could not find a buyer for their stinky house .

Word got out and eventually even the local realtors refused to return their calls.

Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new place.

The ex-wife called the man and asked how things were going.

He told her the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely and said that she missed her old home terribly and would be willing to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house back .

Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was, he agreed on a price that was about 1/10th of what the house had been worth, but only if she were to sign the papers that very day .

She agreed and within the hour his lawyers delivered the paperwork.

A week later the man and his girlfriend stood smiling as they watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new home.........

And to spite the ex-wife, they even took the the curtain rods!!!!!!


Debate Forum / New tax systems
« on: September 08, 2008, 09:03:29 PM »
This is the first comparison that I have seen that you can check out to be sure it is true.  Thank you whomever sent this. And this says nothing about stripping of the DoD, appeasement of the terrorists, and loss of US sovereignty under "world citizen" Obama\'s relinquishment of US rights to the UN and World Court .  Nor does it talk of loss of rights in "Fairness Laws" which are only fair to the minority.  
Favors new drilling offshore McCain  Yes Obama No  
Will appoint judges who interpret the law not make it  McCain Yes  Obama No  

Served in the US Armed Forces  McCain Yes  Obama No  
Amount of time served in the US Senate  McCain 22 YEARS  Obama 173 DAYS  
Will institute a socialized national health care plan  McCain No  Obama Yes  
Supports abortion throughout the pregnancy  McCain No  Obama Yes  
Would pull troops out of Iraq immediately  McCain No  Obama Yes  
Supports gun ownership rights  McCain Yes  Obama No  
Supports homosexual marriage  McCain No  Obama Yes  
Proposed programs will mean a huge tax increase  McCain No  Obama yes  
Voted against making English the official language  McCain No  Obama Yes  
Voted to give Social Security benefits to illegals  McCain No  Obama Yes  


MCCAIN  0% on home sales up to $500,000 per home (couples). McCain does not propose any change in existing home sales income tax.  
OBAMA  28% on profit from ALL home sales.  (How does this affect you? If you sell your home and make a profit, you will pay 28% of your gain on taxes. If you are heading toward retirement and would like to down-size your home or move into a retirement community, 28% of the money you make from your home will go to taxes. This proposal will adversely affect the elderly who are counting on the income from their homes as part of their retirement income.)  


MCCAIN  15% (no change)  
OBAMA  39.6% - (How will this affect you? If you have any money invested in stock market, IRA, mutual funds, college funds, life insurance, retirement accounts, or anything that pays or reinvests dividends, you will now be paying nearly 40% of the money earned on taxes if Obama becomes president. The experts predict that \'Higher tax rates on dividends and capital gains would crash the stock market, yet do absolutely nothing to cut the deficit.\')  


MCCAIN (no changes)  Single making 30K - tax $4,500
Single making 50K - tax $12,500
Single making 75K - tax $18,750
Married making 60K- tax $9,000
Married making 75K - tax $18,750
Married making 125K - tax $31,250  

OBAMA (reversion to pre-Bush tax cuts)  Single making 30K - tax $8,400
Single making 50K - tax $14,000
Single making 75K - tax $23,250
Married making 60K - tax $16,800
Married making 75K - tax $21,000
Married making 125K - tax $38,750
Under Obama, your taxes could almost double!  


MCCAIN  - 0% (No change, Bush repealed this tax)  
OBAMA  Restore the inheritance tax Many families have lost businesses, farms, ranches, and homes that have been in their families for generations because they could not afford the inheritance tax. Those willing their assets to loved ones will only lose them to these taxes.  


New government taxes proposed on homes that are more than 2400 square feet.  New gasoline taxes (as if gas weren\'t high enough already) New taxes on natural resources consumption (heating gas, water, electricity)  New taxes on retirement accounts, and last but not least....New taxes to pay for socialized medicine so we can receive the same level of medical care as other third-world countries!!!  
You can verify the above at the following web sites:

Entertainment / The movie "Mirrors"
« on: September 07, 2008, 12:52:32 AM »
I hope no one here is planning on seeing it.   It is one of those awesome movies, keeps you on the edge of your seat, til the last few minutes.  In other words, the endings sucks bad.   It has an ending that is either just plain terrible, or is a lead into a part II.  Either way, we were not pleased.  So don\'t go see it til it comes on tv.    Crazy

Trivia And Games / Death, and lawyers!
« on: September 06, 2008, 08:43:27 AM »
The madam opened the brothel door and saw a rather dignified,
well-dressed, good-looking man in his late 40s or early 50\'s.

\'May I help you?\' she asked.

I want to see Valerie,\' the man replied.

\'Sir, Valerie is one of our most expensive ladies. Perhaps you would
prefer someone else,\' said the madam.

\'No. I must see Valerie,\' he replied.

Just then, Valerie appeared and announced to the man that she charged
$5,000 a visit. Without hesitation, the man pulled out five thousand
dollars and gave it to Valerie, and they went upstairs. After an hour, the man
calmly left.

The next night, the same man appeared again, once more demanding to
see Valerie. Valerie explained that no one had ever come back two nights
in a row -- too expensive -- and there were no discounts. The price was still

Again the man pulled out the money, gave it to Valerie, and they went

After an hour, he left.

The following night the man was there yet again. Everyone was astounded
that he had come for a third consecutive night, but he paid Valerie and they
went upstairs.

After their session, Valerie questioned the man. \'No one has ever been
with me three nights in a row. Where are you from?\' she asked. The man replied,

\'\'Really\' she said. \'I have family in Boston .\'\'I know,\' the man said.
\'Your father died, and I am your sister\'s attorney. She asked me to give you your $15,000

The moral of the story is that three things in life are certain:

1. Death

2. Taxes ........ and

3. Being screwed by a lawyer

Debate Forum / How to have a Positive Outlook each day...
« on: September 03, 2008, 09:50:21 PM »
How To Start Each Day With A Positive Outlook

1. Open a new file in your computer.

2. Name it \'Barack Obama\'.

3. Send it to the Recycle Bin.

4. Empty the Recycle Bin.

5. Your PC will ask you: \'Do you really want to get rid of \'Barack Obama?\'

6. Firmly Click \'Yes.\'

7. Feel better?



Open Chat / Real friends!
« on: September 03, 2008, 08:53:38 PM »
This is so true....thanks for being a real friend

FAKE FRIENDS: Never ask for food.

REAL FRIENDS: Are the reason you have no food.

FAKE FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr/Mrs

REAL FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD/MOM

FAKE FRIENDS: Never seen you cry

REAL FRIENDS: Cry with you

FAKE FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back

REAL FRIENDS: Keep your stuff so long they forget it\'s yours

FAKE FRIENDS: Know a few things about you

REAL FRIENDS: Could write a book about you with direct quotes from you

FAKE FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing

REAL FRIENDS : Will kick the whole crowds butt that left you

FAKE FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door

REAL FRIENDS: Walk right in and say \'I\'M HOME!\'

FAKE FRIENDS: Are for awhile

REAL FRIENDS: Are for life

FAKE FRIENDS: Will talk bad to the person who talks bad about you.

REAL FRIENDS: Will knock the person out that talked bad about you

REAL FRIENDS: Will send this to all their real friends and hope to get it back!

If you were killed today, I\'m sorry I wouldn\'t be able to come to your funeral, because I\'d be in jail for killing the person who did it.

Trivia And Games / Hospital talk.........
« on: September 03, 2008, 07:17:30 PM »
Two little kids are in a hospital, lying on stretchers next to each other
outside the operating room---the first surgeries of the day.

The first kid leans over and asks, \'What are you in here for?\'

The second kid says, \'I\'m in here to get my tonsils out and I\'m a little

The first kid says, \'You\'ve got nothing to worry about.  I had that done when
I was four.  They put you to sleep, and when you wake up they give you lots
of Jell-O and Ice Cream.  It\'s a breeze.\'

The second kid then asks, \'What are you here for?\'

The first kid says, \'A circumcision.\'

Whoa!\' the second kid replies.  \'Good luck buddy.  I had that done when I was
born.  Couldn\'t walk for a year.\'


Trivia And Games / Guts, or............
« on: August 29, 2008, 10:10:41 PM »
Guts or Balls...

There is a medical distinction. We\'ve all heard about people having guts or balls, but do you really know the difference between them? In an effort to keep you informed, the definitions are listed below:

GUTS - Is arriving home late after a night out with the boys, being met by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to ask: \'\'Are you still cleaning, or are you flying somewhere?\'\'

BALLS - Is coming home late after a night out with the boys, smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the arse and having the balls to say: \'\'You\'re next, fatty.\'\'

I hope this clears up any confusion on the definitions. Medically speaking, there is no difference in the outcome, since both ultimately result in death...

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